1. I woke up at 3:33 this morning to take my dog out. My husband was missing.

2. I went back to bed.

3. This is normal. He disappears often. I’m pretty sure he’s in North Carolina.

4. My parents finally showed up.

5. My dad went to bed before my mom. I’ve never actually seen that happen.

6. I love that you are reading about absolutely nothing.

7. I have to sleep with Taylor for the next few days.

8. That is iffy.

9. FACT: I was fallen on by a very large drunk man this week.

10. FACT: I was almost run over by a very drunk bike rider this week.

11. FACT: I was nearly (this week) ended by a very apologetic, very bad driver on Spruce and Broadway. She apologized by hanging out of her window and making lots of hand signals and shaking her head a lot and saying she was sorry. Very unusual.

12. FACT: I was flipped off royally by some dude because I went the speed limit. He had a very bad manicure.

13. I disobeyed the law (this week) and let my dog run wild in a fenced in area. The last time I did this, I got a warning. The time before that, I got a warning. Because I changed my name and my address and spoke in an incoherent accent. Because that’s funny.

14. In Oklahoma, you let your dog run wild in a fenced area. In Boulder, you pay for it. So I could seriously care less.

15. My mommy and daddy are here.

26. I told Taylor I was sleeping on her side. She said ok.

I have to go now.

I love you.

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